Monday, August 11, 2008

10 VERY Random Monday Musings....

  1. I've been thinking about perspective lately. Isn't it interesting how perspective changes EVERYTHING? The other night we were having dinner at a Japanese Hibachi style restaurant. There was another couple at the table visiting the states from England. They said, "Now this is a pretty big city - isn't it?" We looked at each other and kind of laughed and said, "Well, no - not really...." The woman said, "Well, the village in England that we're from only has about 40 houses..." So yea - I guess where we live is a THRIVING metropolis! It made me think about how we all have different perspectives in life - I hope I can remember that - because since we are all coming from different directions, we all have different experiences. Sometimes it's good to realize that we're not all the same, and everyone doesn't think exactly like I do (thank goodness!)
  2. Saturday night Cory and I went on a date. It was a special date because we came home from our movie (which - by the way - don't bother to go see the new Mummy movie....dumb!) our baby sitter had BOTH boys asleep - and they stayed that way!!!! Now this probably doesn't sound like that big of a deal - but most of the time we plan our dates to be either after the boys go to sleep - and we go to a late movie - or we'll just tell the babysitter to keep them up. It can be such a pain to get them to bed at night with all of their 'routines'. But on Saturday we told her what to do - and it worked! Both boys went down, didn't get up at all and were snoring soundly when we got home. YAY! Cory paid her extra and we felt like we'd entered a new babysitting era. Now a night out can really feel like a night out, when we don't have to come home and do "mom and dad" stuff when we get home.
  3. It's funny how as we get older we start to like things that we thought we didn't like as we were growing up. For instance - I just recently realized that I really like: bleu cheese, feta cheese, sushi (YUM! I havent' tried a lot, but the things I have tried I really enjoyed. And I'm excited to try some more soon.) and weeding my yard. The most surprising is - weeding my yard! I've mentioned that before Cory and I were married that I told him, "I don't iron, and I don't pull weeds. If you still want to marry me - that's great - but those 2 things are NOT changing." Well - it has worked out pretty good for the most part. But this summer I have found that I actually *GASP* enjoy pulling weeds! There is something very satisfying about looking out at my (almost) weed-free yard and know that I did that. When I need to do a chore that makes me feel accomplished I go out and pull some weeds. I have fun with it now...and my mother-in-law was right, "If you just weed 10 minutes a day - you can stay on top of things and it doesn't seem like too much." (It takes me maybe 20 minutes a week!) Next summer I fully intend on planting flowers, and possibly even a very small garden. I'm going to start small, but I do think there's something to this gardening gig.
  4. Why is it when we have a great night with Hunter sleeping (from 9 pm-8:00 am!) I wake up in the middle of the night with a splitting headache? Then shortly after - Gabe wakes up and insists on getting in bed with us. So on a night when I should have been getting a great night sleep I ended up awake at 4:00 am and not falling asleep until my pain reliever kicks in - just 15 minutes before my alarm was supposed to go off. (Which - by-the-way - meant I turned off my alarm and slept an extra 2 hours. Oops...)
  5. I really have a hard time communicating myself sometimes - and this results in me saying something the way that it makes sense to me - but having it come across wrong and offending someone else. Does this happen to anyone else? I hate it! I don't like offending people, and I can tell you that as a general rule of thumb - if you read something on my blog that offends you - it wasn't meant that way, and you're reading into it the wrong way. Generally if I'm mad at someone, or want to say something in a hurtful way - I won't say anything at all. I'll hold it inside and let it bug me - but I won't say anything to anyone else - especially the person I'm mad at. So if you've been hurt or offended by something I've implied, or said on my blog - know I didn't mean to hurt your feelings, and I'm sorry that you took it that way.
  6. In relation to the last thought - Cory gets mad because he says that this world of blogs, text messaging, and email that we all misunderstand way too much. He says that we all read too much into things, get too worked up, and use blogs/text/email as our only way of communicating - which opens way too many windows and opportunities for accidentally offending people. Know what....he's right.....
  7. Last week I had a special friend say that they were worried about me for various reasons - one of which was the fact that it didn't appear that I was finding joy in motherhood. True, there are days when I just feel burnt out and frazzled. I haven't handled Hunter's teething, or Gabe's potty training with much style or grace...But when she said this it really made me think. How often do I stop and enjoy the moments with my children? It's been more obvious to me this last week as my babies have celebrated their birthdays that time is ZOOMING by. I'm going to blink my eyes and suddenly my kids aren't going to be little, sure - that means they will (hopefully) be potty trained, more independent, and not *need* me as much - but on the flip side - they won't be little anymore. So I made a little commitment to myself that I would work on finding joy in my family and being a mother more. Since I have been more conscious of that it seems that I've relaxed a little bit and I have had some truly joyous moments. I've tried to take more time out to read stories, play silly games, blow bubbles, trips to the park, a break to play with bubble wrap (or "giant bubble fire-works" as Gabe calls it) or snuggle with the boys. I've tried to find those moments when we could really be making cherished memories. Now, I have a long way to go - but I'm working on it and it really is making me smile.
  8. In sacrament meeting yesterday there was a talk about being kind. Actually - the whole meeting was on being kind. One of the speakers said, "Nothing exposes our true self more than how we treat each other in our homes." YIKES! I guess I knew that concept, but hearing it at church yesterday made me stop and think. The world gets a pretty good view of me most of the time. I try to be dressed nicely (although a lot of times it's a stretch just to be dressed cleanly...), speak kindly in public, smile. I generally don't yell in public, or get super frustrated. For the most part I *think* I appear pulled together and on top of my game. However- at home.....ha! It's too easy for me to snap at my kids, be irritated with my husband, take my bad mood out on others, etc. This week I'm also going to work on treating my family in the way that I treat others. They are the very most important part of my life, and I need to work extra hard at treating them lovingly. It's sad that so often they get what's leftover at the end of the day, and many days....that's not much. So join with me this week to help give our families our very best. After all - they are what is important, and hopefully the people who will be with us forever.
  9. I am starting to feel a part of the Primary now. I do miss our Young Women and the connection that I have had with them - but I'm starting to feel a connection with my Primary class and I love it! We have a large class, and it can be exhausting - but this last week I just loved hearing the kids answer the questions (even with some of their off-the-wall answers), I loved watching some new boys in our class feel like a part of things, and I enjoyed feeling like maybe they listen to at least a part of what we are trying to teach them. Six and seven year olds are pretty fun.
  10. Also in church one of the hymns we sang was, "Our Savior's Love". What a beautiful hymn - and a great reminder that our Savior loves us unconditionally, and can literally be the sun that shines down and "breaks through clouds of strife". I have felt that love, and it is such a blessing in my life.

5 comments:

Brian & Charlotte Carper said...

HEY - twice in this post you mentioned stuff you had heard and absorbed from sacrament meeting.... you know what that means?? you weren't out in the hall with a screaming kid. YOU WERE actually able to hear what was going on around you. hmmmm sounds like progress to me ! ! !

cemarcano said...

I love reading your musings, however though I may agree to a point with Cory, I have to say that before reading your blog I didn't know you at all and now the more I read it the more I like you and relate and think it would be nice to be closer because we are probably a lot alike - or at least I can say ditto to many of your thoughts. So though miles seperate us, I enjoy getting online and feeling connected to another human being = more specifically another adult and even more specifically, another mother. =)It's also nice to know I'm not the only frustrated, imperfect mother out there trying to figure out how to find those joyful moments a little more often.

Chase and Kori said...

Beautiful post, Joanna. I think most of these areas of improvement that you've recognized are ones that most people need to work on as well. We're thinking of you guys and hope you know how much we missed you and your beautiful little family when we went to the lake over the weekend. Love ya!

Me - Jen said...

Wow quite random thoughts!! I loved them and have to agree with another comment that all your "opportunites" are things that I think we can all work on.

Second the person that said something about you not enjoying motherhood is either not a mother or not true to herself. You showing the frustrations of motherhood help me to realize I am not a bad mother for being frustrated. I know you can love something like motherhood while embracing the crappy and hard parts of it. It is a hard job and I think we would be lying to ourselves if we put on our fake smile about it. I love how true you are about your feelings. Keep keeping it real!! You are awesome and very motivating!! Loved the post!! Oh and I don't get offended and I know you, you are NOT even close to being offensive, you are to cute and nice for that!!

april said...

I can totally relate to #5...sometimes I feel like I'm speaking a foreign language that nobody else understands. If I'm not sticking my foot in my mouth, then I'm incapable of conveying to people what it is I need to get across. I cant seem to get a couple of people to understand how I expect to be treated. Am I not speaking the right language or are they not hearing me? Makes me doubt both ways.

Kevin is like Cory, telling me that we cant fully understand peoples tones/intentions unless spoken directly to.